So the evidence seems to be stacking up against Jessica Biel’s heterosexuality. Following up on my earlier entry, there actually seems to be a picture of Jessica Biel kissing a girl. And don’t give me any of that “oh women in Europe do it all the time”, because the chick has her arm around Jessica Biel’s neck and they are totally into it. So yeah. I think that the evidence is ample. Here is the picture:
The NY Daily News reported today that Jessica Biel was seen kissing another chick at Lotus nightclub in New York.
Now, I had a big problem when Esquire named Jessica Biel the sexiest woman alive. A big problem! She’s nowhere near sexiest! I would give her an 8 (out of 10), whereas I would give chicks like Charlize Theron, Uma Thurman, and Jake Gyllenhaal a 9! Therefore I was astounded at the Esquire rating.
But now, after hearing this story, I really have to say that I am re-evaluating my evaluation. Perhaps you are not aware of my rating system: points (out of 10) are earned for various attributes. Being a female cop earns you +2 points, being a scientist (in the natural sciences) earns you +1.5; being a female cop who practices natural sciences part-time, earns you +3 points. But being a hot lesbian earns you +4 points!
So now on to the re-evaluation. Initially, after reading the Esquire list, I sort of up-raised my rating of Jessica Biel from a 7 to 7.5-8. So now, after hearing about this lesbian story, I must honestly and unabashedly add the 4 points and say that her rating has shot way up now from a tepid 7-8 points to a hot lipstick lesbian 11-12 points (this is out of 10)! I mean, she kisses another chick! And according to reports the other chick was pretty hot too.
Please, oh please, God, let it be true! I need updates! Updates and photos! Photos and updates! Come onnnnnnnnnnnnn Lesbian Jessica Biel. I am crossing my fingers.