The NY Daily News reported today that Jessica Biel was seen kissing another chick at Lotus nightclub in New York.
Now, I had a big problem when Esquire named Jessica Biel the sexiest woman alive. A big problem! She’s nowhere near sexiest! I would give her an 8 (out of 10), whereas I would give chicks like Charlize Theron, Uma Thurman, and Jake Gyllenhaal a 9! Therefore I was astounded at the Esquire rating.
But now, after hearing this story, I really have to say that I am re-evaluating my evaluation. Perhaps you are not aware of my rating system: points (out of 10) are earned for various attributes. Being a female cop earns you +2 points, being a scientist (in the natural sciences) earns you +1.5; being a female cop who practices natural sciences part-time, earns you +3 points. But being a hot lesbian earns you +4 points!
So now on to the re-evaluation. Initially, after reading the Esquire list, I sort of up-raised my rating of Jessica Biel from a 7 to 7.5-8. So now, after hearing about this lesbian story, I must honestly and unabashedly add the 4 points and say that her rating has shot way up now from a tepid 7-8 points to a hot lipstick lesbian 11-12 points (this is out of 10)! I mean, she kisses another chick! And according to reports the other chick was pretty hot too.
Please, oh please, God, let it be true! I need updates! Updates and photos! Photos and updates! Come onnnnnnnnnnnnn Lesbian Jessica Biel. I am crossing my fingers.