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Why is Justin Bieber still around?

I am genuinely curious about this. What do the tweens see in him (and is it only the tweens)? He looks like a female lesbian, and has only matured into this with every year. I am convinced he is a woman pretending to be a man. Aside from his questionable douchy/bratty appearance with loose pants, the requisite diamond earring, and leather jacket, what does he have to offer? His music is not innovative, though I will admit he might be more talented than the average singer. But what is it??? What makes this brat so appealing and attractive? Do not say talent. All the other traits that I have listed make talent a moot point.

Here’s the brat, apparently 18 years old (really?) attending some kind of Las Vegas boxing match. Who cares, really.

Kellan Lutz is a tool (nothing new)…

Look at this Oompa Loompa. How can anybody think this is a good look. From his hat to his mismatched tie/shirt/jacket combo. Has anyone ever thought of this man as good looking???

More of Sara Evans’ allegations

Craigh SchelskeJust another interesting thing about allegations from Sara Evans concerning her husband Schelske. (Following up on my earlier entry.)

According to divorce papers, Schelske is so addicted to porn that he had taken to browsing personal ads on Craig’s List for things like “three party sex” and “anal sex”. Divorce papers also allege that the man was caught by their eldest child watching pornography, and that he (again) has a pornography addiction and keeps 100s of pictures of himself in a naked and erect state.

So whatever, right? The man is just a fun-loving kind of guy, right? Who cares right? Well not quite, the man is an avid Republican. He even ran (unsuccessfully) for a bid at Congress as a Republican . You know.. The party that’s against all sorts of that kind of misconduct. Seems like the Republicans have been showing themselves as real hypocrites lately. The guy seems like a real douchebag, really he does.

You can even check out his website. I guess cause his bid for Congress failed, there’s nothing really up there except a donation page. He strikes me as very creepy indeed!

There are further details about allegations against Schelske here. I am finding myself firmly in Sara Evans’ camp. Not that she needs me there, but I am totally on her side.

Grey’s Anatomy Feud

Patrick DempseyTMZ has reports of the reported (:)) feuding on the set of Grey’s Anatomy. Who is feuding, and why should I care, you ask? Well I’ll tell you why you should care. I’ll tell you. Actually I don’t know why you should care, but here’s what is new.

Show insiders say that Patrick Dempsey was seen being shoved and choked by Isaiah Washington. Washington has reportedly said that he’s sick of Dempsey, sick of his “nice guy image”, and apparently expletives were exchanged.

Read More…

Donald Trump makes words of wisdom come out his ass

Donald Trump has spoken out on Paris Hilton:

Paris said she wants to build a brand just like Donald Trump. And I don’t know if she’s done it the same way but she is smart like a fox. People say, ‘Oh, she’s not smart, she’s not this, she’s not that.’ She’s done a very good job.

Donald Trump and Larry KingDonald who the f*ck are you kidding? Who? Not me. If a donkey said something nice about you, you would be on your knees pleasuring it orally. Give me a break you giant, toupe-ed, douchebag. Oh sorry. Those are glorified hair extensions, not a toupe. My bad.

What’s this picture about, you ask? That’s a picture of Larry King petting the wolverine that has woven its nest on Donald Trump’s head.

Larry Birkhead more douche-y moves

You might have already read my entry about Larry Birkhead trying to climb the Z-List ladder.

Today there was a further announcement that he’s sending in his lawyer into California court in order to ask the judge to order Anna Nicole Smith to return to California (from the Bahamas) and to submit to drug testing.

Again, is this a case of bad timing? Could he, perhaps, have not heard that she just lost her son? Maybe.

But I think that it is something so much worse. I think that he heard, and I think that while Anna Nicole’s star is sort of twinkling a little brighter in the media, he wants to get a little splash of light on himself. I mean, call me cold hearted and cynical, his moves are just so off in this whole matter.

Larry Birkhead climbing the Z-List ladder

Larry Birkhead, have you heard of him? Neither have I. Well actually I had an entry about him earlier last week, in reference to his claim that he is the father of Anna Nicole Smith’s baby.

So whatever, right? Wrong. It was announced earlier last night, that Birkhead has filed a paternity suit against Anna Nicole Smith to get her to come to California and have her newborn baby Dannie Lynn Smith tested and himself tested to determine his paternity.

How freaky is this? This follows, based on my earlier entry, logically from my theory about 2 men using a mildly retarded celebrity to climb the celebrity ladder from the Z-List where they currently are, to some semblance of a D-List.

Well whatever it is, the suit is clearly in bad taste following the death of Anna Nicole Smith’s son Daniel. Let us suppose that Birkhead is legitimately worried and let us suppose that he legitimately fears that Anna Nicole is trying to flee with his baby by splitting to the Bahamas… But what the freaking hell does he think, did she engineer the death of her own son in order to move the spotlight away from the paternity issue?? I mean, seriously, he couldn’t wait a couple of months until Daniel was in the ground before filing this stupid lawsuit?

I don’t know what’s going on, especially with respect to Howard K. Stern exchanging vows with Anna Nicole and then Anna Nicole saying that they are not married. This is a Trailer Park Opera at its worst. But no matter how Trailer Park Anna Nicole is or how ditzed-out of her mind she is, let her grieve a little bit for the death of her son. That is not a joke.

These 2 guys are just the scum of the earth. Scum! Douchebags — the both of them.

I don’t like Joe Simpson

As in the father of Ashlee and Jessica Simpson. Why don’t I like him, well I just saw on the blogs that Joe Simpson hit some metal railing with the side of his Ferrari and didn’t bother to get out to check the damage.

What pisses me off the most is that he has a Ferrari!!! Why don’t we investigate HIM for child slavery? Hm? I guarantee you that there must’ve been some sleepless crying nights in the lives of teenage Ashlee and Jessica, when Papa would come down the stairs and hit them over the head for not practicing their singing or not doing enough situps. I can tell that he was such a douchebag even then.

He became rich BECAUSE of his daughters. He didn’t somehow magically cause them to become rich! He enjoys the prestige and wealth because of their singing and performing, and yet he acts like a real sh*theel, wherever he goes. From blocking photographers from taking pictures of his daughters on the red carpet, to ruining their love lives with precisely placed leaks to the paparazzi, to firing their press-people for no good reason whatsoever.

The man is a goddamn nuisance! Why can’t he just leave us all alone and slip off forever into obscurity?!? And now, to boot, he has a Ferrari!! A Ferrari! Damn you, Joe Simpson! Have some shame.

What did you do to deserve that Ferrari? What, you are their manager? Don’t you think that a rancid cup of yogurt could manage Jessica and Ashlee better than you — the failed minister? Or do you think that you deserve something as a sperm donor?

Well heck, why don’t they just give you a bus ticket to Bolivia then and wave you on your way?

This is a personal plea to both Ashlee and Jessica: please kick your no good douchebag of a father to the curb, he is only ruining your careers. And at the same time you can do the whole world a favour by getting him out of the spotlight and out of everyone’s lives.

Jessica Simpson’s sweet smelling poo

You know that Jessica Simpson is a real star, when you even have to know the names of her assistants.

This is the case with Adrienne Sands, who according to Page Six, has been complaining to all her friends how much it sucks to be Jessica Simpson’s assistant.  Apparently the job is too menial for her and she doesn’t feel that her university degree is being put to good use wiping Jessica’s butt.

That’s Ok Adrienne, don’t worry about it, you won’t be around for long. I’m sure that after your complaints, Joe Simpson is going to cook up some particularly nasty little surprise about how to get you fired.

Maybe Joe will book a visit to Sea World and will push you into a tank of sharks. Or maybe he’ll stage a knife-throwing contest in his house and ask you to put an apple on your head. Or maybe he’ll just publically fire you in the most embarassing way possible.

If I were you Adrienne, after your comments, I would start looking for a new job right away. Don’t wait for that modern day Genghis Khan to strike.

Anna Nicole Smith really living up to the trailer trash moniker

Yesterday on Larry King Live, Anna Nicole Smith’s long time hanger-on and friend Howard K. Stern (who purports to also be her lawyer) admitted that he is the father of Smith’s baby.

Quelle surprise. At this point, the only thing that separates Anna Nicole Smith from the trailer park is a couple of million dollars and some diet pills.

But seriously. This is a story right out of Jerry Springer, since earlier in the summer “freelance journalist” Larry Birkhead claimed to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith’s baby and asked for a paternity suit. All we need is some folding chairs to be thrown around and an audience wearing triple extra-large football jerseys yelling “JERRY! JERRY!”

Howard K. Stern has disputed Birkhead’s claim. Stern says that he believes himself to be the father and that he loves Anna Nicole Smith and hopes that she shares his feelings. How sad are you Stern? Have you ever considered getting a real job you giant freaking douche bag?

What’s most immoral about this is that whoever impregnated Anna Nicole, pretty impregnated a functionally retarded person. Poor Anna Nicole and poor baby.