Archive | Celebrity Weight Problems RSS for this section

Miley Cyrus falls into Hollywood’s standards

It would be hard to be a celebrity, and be forced to submit to the every day stress to be skinny, thin, and to fit into a size zero. I know it would fuck me up to see blogs writing about how thin or fat I have become, examining every inch of me, constantly aware of every imperfection. I know that I would never be able to submit myself to such constant scrutiny. But then, Miley Cyrus was born into this world and has known nothing but the Hollywood way of life.

I don’t want to be a part of the scrutiny, and I can’t pretend to know what it’s like to live under such a magnifying glass. So I wont say a word for or against Miley Cyrus and her new weight loss.

Advertisements

Nicole Richie in private hospital

Very very thin Nicole RichieHer publicist(s) are saying that she is “working” with doctors and nutritionists on an undisclosed problem. Hm.

I picture a conveyor belt of donuts a-la Simpsons with Nicole being strapped into a chair, her nose plugged with one of those swimming nose plugs, while a machine is chewing the food for her and she is forced to swallow dozens of donuts at a time.

Man. I wish I had her problems. Unfortunately it’s all the other way for me. The last time I went for a walk is when firemen broke the side wall of my house down and I was lowered in a crane from the 5th floor in order to be drained of my fluids to give me a new lease on life.

Damn. Some people have all the luck. Like me and about a billion starving children that could only wish they were working with teams of doctors and nutritionists.

Alec Baldwin a real fatty

I saw The Departed over the weekend and I have to say: Alec Baldwin has become a real fatass. In high school, my English teacher confessed to me that Alec Baldwin was a real hottie, a heart-throb, a real man.

And, I mean, though I’m straight — I have to say he had that clean-cut image of Tom Cruise that helped him really score a first place in his then-wife’s (and then-hottie) heart.

Read More…