It would be hard to be a celebrity, and be forced to submit to the every day stress to be skinny, thin, and to fit into a size zero. I know it would fuck me up to see blogs writing about how thin or fat I have become, examining every inch of me, constantly aware of every imperfection. I know that I would never be able to submit myself to such constant scrutiny. But then, Miley Cyrus was born into this world and has known nothing but the Hollywood way of life.
I don’t want to be a part of the scrutiny, and I can’t pretend to know what it’s like to live under such a magnifying glass. So I wont say a word for or against Miley Cyrus and her new weight loss.
Her publicist(s) are saying that she is “working” with doctors and nutritionists on an undisclosed problem. Hm.
I picture a conveyor belt of donuts a-la Simpsons with Nicole being strapped into a chair, her nose plugged with one of those swimming nose plugs, while a machine is chewing the food for her and she is forced to swallow dozens of donuts at a time.
Man. I wish I had her problems. Unfortunately it’s all the other way for me. The last time I went for a walk is when firemen broke the side wall of my house down and I was lowered in a crane from the 5th floor in order to be drained of my fluids to give me a new lease on life.
Damn. Some people have all the luck. Like me and about a billion starving children that could only wish they were working with teams of doctors and nutritionists.
I saw The Departed over the weekend and I have to say: Alec Baldwin has become a real fatass. In high school, my English teacher confessed to me that Alec Baldwin was a real hottie, a heart-throb, a real man.
And, I mean, though I’m straight — I have to say he had that clean-cut image of Tom Cruise that helped him really score a first place in his then-wife’s (and then-hottie) heart.