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Snooki is unleashing a baby boy on the world

Oh I just cannot wait! And did you hear she is supposedly engaged to some tool named Jionni LaValle? Who would become engaged to this (Snooki showing off her pregnancy cleavage):

I realize how harsh I am sounding, but from my experience watching 10 minutes of the first Jersey Shore episode (that’s all my curiosity could stomach), I really don’t see how this woman will ever be anything other than a bad mother.

Is Nicole Richie pregnant?

Who knew there was an awards ceremony for perfume? Apparently there is an award for everything now. The rich and famous just love to pat themselves on the back for being ‘amazing’, don’t they? Do celebrities even play a part in creating their own fragrances to begin with? Are they not just a name that is placed to a scent?

As a side note, here is Nicole Richie looking beautiful at the FiFi Awards. Is she pregnant? Why do her tatas look so huge, and is it the gown or does she have a bit of a bulge around her stomach. I am not one to hate on a woman for being a little bloated, as it happens to all of us women at least once a month. So if this is the case, then please ignore my comments.

Megan Fox is growing larger (due to pregnancy)

I refuse to call it a baby bump, hence the awkward title. So there she is, finally beginning to look pregnant. I wonder how long she will look this amazing for. Do you think she will be another Jessica Simpson?

There is no hope for our planet (have you heard Snooki is pregnant?)!

This scum is pregnant, and about to become a mother to a child with no hope at becoming a productive and useful member of society. Do you think Snooki’s child will become a doctor, a lawyer, or a scientist? Or any number of other useful professions that do not include famewhore?

Look at this horrid display of a pregnant woman. Where did she find this dress, and how could she think this was attractive? If Snooki is not the trash of all humanity, I really do not know what is.

P.S. Calling her trailer trash is too good for her, and far too insulting to trailer trash…they have standards too.

Hilary Duff’s little man Luca

I don’t really have anything to say about Hilary Duff’s son Luca. He’s adorable, that’s all that can be said.

I don’t agree that criticism of any celebrity should include the children. Celebrity children should be off limits until they come of age, or do something stupid on their own to become noteworthy. Until that time, I say here’s Luca and he’s adorable. Also, I wish an adult sized shirt of this banana onesie existed.

Apparently the mini-van majority goes crazy for babies though. So here you go. Like I said. A picture of Hilary Duff’s son Luca. Did you get that?

Megan Fox and her frozen face (oh and pregnancy talk, blah blah blah)

Has anybody seen a video of Megan Fox’s face lately? WTF has she done to herself? I know this idea is not new, and she has been fucking up her face for a long time already. I guess because she has sort of been hiding out lately, in the background, that I had forgotten just how truly she messed up her beauty. Take a look.

Oh and she refuses to talk about her pregnancy. I wonder why? Is this a publicist derived scheme or something she herself is uncomfortable with? You can hear the publicist shutting down the question though, and her awkward laughter in response to the baby mention. I don’t know anything about the business side of Hollywood, but what would be the advantage of not talking about her pregnancy? I guess there is an obligation while¬†publicizing¬†a product, to not include any of your personal bullshit. However, why hire the celebrity in the first place? You are hiring what they represent, who they are, to elevate your product status. Anyways end of thoughts…

Here is an older pre-fucked up version of Megan Fox for you to compare to.

Accounting for her obvious youthfulness, baby fat cheeks, and lighter hair colour, you can’t deny that she fucked up. To each their own, I guess.

 

Jessica Simpson finally releases her spawn on the world!

It’s official! There is a baby Jessica Simpson that has been unleashed into the world. Maxwell Drew is the name. Did you read that right? Jessica Simpson has named her baby GIRL Maxwell Drew Johnson.

She must really love coffee, or really wants her child to be teased in middle school. All I can think of is maxipad, as in feminine hygiene products. Really. I just. I don’t even know where to begin. Why didn’t she just name her child Sack of Potatoes, that would have at least been more creative. And who wouldn’t love to meet someone named Sack of Potatoes. This name isn’t trying to be something it isn’t, it just is.