Archive | Celebrity Children RSS for this section

In honour of Mother’s Day

I will be posting some classic, crazy, and/or fucked up quotes as delivered by certain celebrity moms. Here is just a taste, a giant WTF if ever I have seen one.

Courtesy of January Jones, we are graced with this gem of a quote. January goes on to describe just how she survive her busy schedule of no sleep, all work, and no play since the birth of her son. She follows a regimen of healthy eating, vitamins, and tea. And of course, placenta capsulation. Yes. Since the birth of her son, she has ingested in capsule form, her very own placenta.

January elaborated for our amusement:

“Your placenta gets dehydrated and made into vitamins,” she explains. “It’s something I was very hesitant about, but we’re the only mammals who don’t ingest our own placentas.”

January insists that this all-natural WTFery is perfectly normal, and completely “…non witch-crafty or anything!” And indeed, she recommends it to all mothers out there.

And there you have it. If you are at a loss for what to get that special mother of yours, why not surprise her with placenta derived capsules. Surely, a great gift that any mother would cherish. You are after all putting her health above all, and doesn’t that say “I love you” more than a fancy new i-pod, or spa treatment gift certificate?

 

Advertisements

It’s official!

Louis Bardo, Sandra Bullock’s son is the most adorable celebrity baby! I challenge you all to find me a cuter baby. Look at those cheeks! And this photo is a rare gem, showing his cute little smile. Yes I sound a little creepy in my description of the little man, but come on. Look at those cheeks…

Larry Birkhead pines for his (?) daughter

Anna Nicole Smith and Larry BirkheadLarry Birkhead has been posting various things about Dannie Lynn Smith on his website (and you have to see this site to believe it, it can only go one of 2 ways: creepy/insane or actual father). Dannie Lynn is Anna Nicole Smith’s daughter, while the father we are not so sure of.

Anna Nicole Smith’s groupie Howard K. Stern claimed to be the father, right after Larry Birkhead announced his candidacy. Birkhead has filed a paternity suit against Smith in California to get her back from the Bahamas and let him assert his fatherhood over Dannie Lynn.

Read More…

Anna Nicole Smith’s Douchebag

No this is not about an inanimate object used for douching.

This entry is about Howard K. Stern. Apparently some friends of Anna Nicole’s have spoken out on Stern and the Douchebag Award that I gave him earlier, seems to be well awarded.

Anna Nicole Smith’s former manager had this to say about Stern’s commitment ceremony to Anna Nicole in the Bahamas:

Howard is not the nicest person in the world. He seems very controlling. I think he’s in it for the settlement.

And the Compulsory Gay Associate (that every airheaded female celebrity needs to have) Bobby Trendy said the following:

I don’t know any woman who let that man’s private parts near her – even if they were unattached to his body!

Not very good reviews for Stern. But what do you expect? The man is a dogpoo-stain on the upholstery of life. Can there be anything nice to say about him while he, like a vampire, sucks Anna Nicole dry of the little bit of life she possibly had.

2 idiots: Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin

There are no divorces messier than those of Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger. There was much talk of lawsuits and counter-lawsuits a couple of years ago when they were divorcing and trying to iron out the custody issue.

But everything seemed to be settled until yesterday when Basinger was arraigned in court on charges that she broke the child custody agreement with Baldwin.

Among the allegations: she didn’t tell Baldwin when she would be out of town so that he could care for their daughter, she didn’t let Baldwin know when their daughter had some (unspecified) injuries — injuries that required medical help. Read More…

Hyde Club strikes again

TMZ reports that this time the Hyde Club has enied access to Bobby Brown!

Wow. This place must REALLY be happening, because there is no way that any other place in the country would dare to deny access to that man: he is a genuine legend. If it’s not for his wild and wacky relationship with Whitney Houston, then it’s for his lack of child support payments for some of his kids (for which he has a warrant issued against him), then it is at least for the fact that he is a music legend.

But not the Hyde, no sir! They don’t go in for those measly music-legend celebrities. Give the Hyde promiscous Paris Hilton or give it nothing at all.

Larry Birkhead climbing the Z-List ladder

Larry Birkhead, have you heard of him? Neither have I. Well actually I had an entry about him earlier last week, in reference to his claim that he is the father of Anna Nicole Smith’s baby.

So whatever, right? Wrong. It was announced earlier last night, that Birkhead has filed a paternity suit against Anna Nicole Smith to get her to come to California and have her newborn baby Dannie Lynn Smith tested and himself tested to determine his paternity.

How freaky is this? This follows, based on my earlier entry, logically from my theory about 2 men using a mildly retarded celebrity to climb the celebrity ladder from the Z-List where they currently are, to some semblance of a D-List.

Well whatever it is, the suit is clearly in bad taste following the death of Anna Nicole Smith’s son Daniel. Let us suppose that Birkhead is legitimately worried and let us suppose that he legitimately fears that Anna Nicole is trying to flee with his baby by splitting to the Bahamas… But what the freaking hell does he think, did she engineer the death of her own son in order to move the spotlight away from the paternity issue?? I mean, seriously, he couldn’t wait a couple of months until Daniel was in the ground before filing this stupid lawsuit?

I don’t know what’s going on, especially with respect to Howard K. Stern exchanging vows with Anna Nicole and then Anna Nicole saying that they are not married. This is a Trailer Park Opera at its worst. But no matter how Trailer Park Anna Nicole is or how ditzed-out of her mind she is, let her grieve a little bit for the death of her son. That is not a joke.

These 2 guys are just the scum of the earth. Scum! Douchebags — the both of them.